The other day, with nothing better to do, I started watching a new show on iView called Valemont. Exactly 29 seconds later I stopped watching it.
This is why:
On the black screen, there is a mobile phone, and on the phone’s screen there is a young man recording himself. He looks like a jock, carefree and cocky. He says, with mock menace, “Hey! So if you’re watching this, I lost my phone. Do the right thing, man. Give it back. Or else – I’ma find your ass!”
The show’s title comes up onscreen. Then we see a wet-haired, leather-clad, eyeliner-happy woman walk into a room somewhere and we hear her thoughts as voiceover:
Problem was, I never could find Eric’s ass.
Aaaaaaaand I stopped watching.
I could almost forgive the really bad “clever” writing (her recycling his words) if her emphasis had been on the right word. Surely, as Eric was the one who’d threatened to find someone’s ass, for her sentence to make any sense it would have had to be, “I never could find Eric‘s ass.”